Love Makes Me Do This—Encountering the Mercy of Jesus
““When a soul laden with sin, even with sins against my divine Person, blasphemy, sacrilege, and revilement, comes to me with a repentant and broken heart, My love envelopes that soul and purifies her in My Blood. I am the Savior. To one who has confidence in My merciful love, I can refuse nothing. Of the sins cast into the fire of My Heart, nothing remains. They are completely annihilated, reduced, not to ashes, but utterly destroyed and forgotten. Love makes me do this.
Sin given to me ceases to exist; it is forever lost in the infinite ocean of My mercy.
I am Jesus. Mine is to save, to heal, to vivify, and to make lovely in the sight of My Father the souls that consent to the operations of My mercy and to the secret action of the Holy Spirit.””
The Confession, 1838, detail is a painting by Giuseppe Molteni
The passage above is from one of my all time favorite books– In Sinu Jesu. I love it because it touches on the generosity and immeasurability of the Mercy of God.
When I became Catholic eight years ago, I had to make my first confession. And by first confession, I mean a confession that was about to span the past 19 years of little Alli’s life. This was a big deal. Just the idea of doing an examination of conscience for 19 years of my life was beyond intimidating. But as I expressed my concerns to my Catholic friends at our Newman Center at GW, they quickly reassured me in a way that I will never forget. “Alli,” they said, “confession is like a wave of mercy that rushes over you and makes you clean. You have nothing to worry about!” I am an imagery gal, so this idea of God’s mercy acting like a wave from the ocean that would make all things new gave me some much-needed peace.
Meghan (childhood friend + sponsor) + me after the Easter Vigil where I received all my sacraments :)
So I did it. I did an examination for the past 19 years of my life and headed to the church with scribbled papers and got in line for confession. While I was in line, one of my older sorority sisters saw me and asked what I was doing. I told her that I was about to make my first confession, and blood drained from her face. “Oh man, I haven’t been to confession in years,” she said. I could tell the idea of it terrified her–just like it had for me the day before–so I told her what my friends had told me. “Confession is like a wave of mercy that rushes over you and makes you clean.”
She seemed comforted, so she snuck in line behind me and went to confession for the first time in years. The Lord’s mercy is contagious. It’s actually what our heart desires, to be reunited with the God who made us.
Oftentimes, however, our fear and shame keep us from experiencing one of the most healing experiences of our life– God’s mercy.
During this Holy Week we hear the stories of betrayal from the apostles Judas and Peter. These stories are paralleled with one another because they are similar but also drastically different. The Lord paints a picture of His abundant mercy, and He shows us how to receive it.
Like Peter and Judas, we are fallen creatures in need of God’s mercy. In the readings this week, Judas and Peter put themselves before the Lord. (Readings are: Matt 26:14-25 and Jn 13:21-33, 36-38.) Judas chose human adoration (from the Pharisees) and money over trusting and honoring Jesus. Similarly, Peter clung to his own life more than he clung to Jesus, and he gave into the fear that he would lose his life if he confessed his relationship with Jesus. Both abandoned Jesus due to their lack of trust in God.
The big difference between Judas and Peter's betrayal of Jesus, however, is their response after recognizing their grave sin against God.
In Judas' case, he loses complete hope in God's mercy and believes that there is no redemption for himself. This ultimately leads him to run even further from God to the point of taking his own life.
Peter, on the other hand, recognizes his sin and feels bitter grief for his actions. Peter’s response is to run and seek forgiveness from God knowing that His mercy is greater than any of his sins. He trusts in God's mercy.
Fra Angelico (Guido di Pietro) Italian
ca. 1420–23
I think this is a beautiful thing to reflect on today. How often do we feel that our sins are too big for even God to forgive? How often do we hide from God after we sin rather than run into His merciful arms? The forgiveness God offered to Peter and Judas is the same forgiveness He offers us every day. His forgiveness is available to all of us, we just need to ask for it.
As we are in the heart of the Triduum (the evening of Holy Thursday to the evening of Easter Sunday), we are in some of the holiest moments of the Liturgical year. During the season of Lent, I always recognize my infinite need for God. This year in particular, though, I’ve just been so glaringly aware of my littleness and weaknesses. Holy Week is giving me so much encouragement, and I invite you to enter into it with me.
Also, the same abundant mercy that the Lord showed to Peter is offered to us in the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Do not be afraid to repent, for in repentance we find forgiveness, and in forgiveness our souls are made clean! I also invite you to plan when you will attend your next confession–and to follow through on it!
Here are some resources to help you plan!
This resource from the USCCB is awesome! >> Please click the link to find different examinations of conscience for different stages of life!
masstimes.org << you can find all the various Mass times and confession times nearest you!
Most parishes have extra confession times around Easter! So make sure to double check with your parish website to find those extra times :)